


3:39 AM

by orphan_account



Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti)
Genre: Anyways, M/M, Mentions of Undertale, Pining, Richie Tozier Has ADHD, Richie Tozier's horrid sleep schedule, Sad Richie Tozier, Soft Richie Tozier, also, did i spell schedule right??, hell yeah, it's projecting onto richie hours, just the soundtrack but yanno, mentions of south park, no beta we die like men, oh yeah, richie tozier owns a nintendo switch, specifically the games, thats right, undertale man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:21:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,106
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25781275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: it's three thirty-nine am, and richie tozier is eating skittles out of a walmart pill bottle and playing a south park game to distract himself from his crippling loneliness.
Relationships: Richie Tozier/Stanley Uris (mentioned)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 42





	3:39 AM

Richie knows he has a pretty good life. He has loving parents, some of the greatest friends he could ever ask for, good grades, and even his own job. He knows that so many people have it far worse than him, be it in home life or financial status or anything else you could think of. Hell, even some of his own friends have it far, far worse than him.

Richie knows all of this, and he reminds himself of it a lot whenever he gets upset over something. Other people have it so much worse, so why should he be upset over something? But reminding himself of this fact never stops him from feeling sad or upset. It doesn't stop the way he feels disgusting when he gets far too in his head about everything.

The best way Richie can describe how he's feeling is as if he's rotting from the inside out. He's filled with rot and maggots and bugs and they started out small and inconsequential but now they've infested his whole body and he doesn't know how to get rid of them. His whole body feels so heavy and there's this ache in his chest and he just feels so viscerally sad. It's all-consuming and he doesn't know how to cope with it because he was bottling it up for so long.

Or, at least, he doesn't know how to healthily cope with it. He certainly has his ways of doing things, but they're not necessarily good for him. Richie was quite sure getting high every other night and seeing how many melatonin gummies he could eat until he passed out wasn't healthy. And he was also sure that trying to flat out ignore his emotions wasn't so healthy either.

But Richie had never particularly cared for his health, so it didn't matter to him. Hell, not caring about his health much was partially how he had gotten himself into his current situation. Sat on the floor of his bedroom, playing South Park The Fractured but Whole on his Nintendo switch and eating skittles out of a pill bottle. He has the Undertale soundtrack playing in the background, even with his game he needs some sort of background noise and the Undertale soundtrack specifically makes his ADHD brain pleased so he's as calm as he can really manage to be.

This all started relatively small. Richie had gotten a text from Stanley saying how he had managed to get a date with this girl named Patty. Richie knew this would happen eventually. Stan had been talking to him about Patty for a while now, and he seemed to really like her, so it came as no surprise to know that they would try a date. And Richie tried to be happy for him, he really did.

But he could only be so happy for Stanley when he had been in love with him since they were little kids. Richie knew it was selfish to be mad at Stan (and he wasn't mad at him) so he just tried to give his support. He texted Stanley back some sort of congratulations and something about hoping it goes well because Richie wants to be a good friend, his own emotional baggage aside.

But of course, the moment the interaction was over Richie was absolutely bawling his eyes out. Sure, there was no need for him to hold in his tears while he was texting, but he felt like he had to, so he did it anyways.

One he was done sobbing his eyes out, he moved onto where he was now. On his floor, trying to ignore his feelings with a video game and skittles. Which, wasn't really going to well, if he would be honest. Sure, he was enjoying his game, and the candy was nice, but nothing really seemed to work. The moment he started thinking his mind went right back to Stan.

He didn't want to think about Stanley, it's not like he was trying to make himself cry again, but he can't help it. It's all he can think about, any moment of silence or downtime leads to him wondering what he could've done to have stopped this, or if Stanley would even like him. He knew it was a lost cause, there's nothing he could've truly done to change the outcome of this situation, he's still upset over it.

So, here he stays. In his bedroom, at three thirty-nine am, playing a stupid game and eating skittles. Wondering how long it'll be before Stanley and Patty start dating, and he starts seeing him less and less until Richie completely loses the boy he fell in love with. It's an endless cycle really. This is a place he always ends up in.

No matter what happens to him or what he tries to do, he always ends up here. In his room, late at night, trying to block out his sorrows with some other unhealthy coping mechanism or another.

When Richie wakes up in the morning (he doesn't remember falling asleep but he's still on the floor so he assumes he passed out) he knows he'll find himself back there. He always does.

That ache in his chest is gone for the moment, but it won't last long. When Richie gets up and starts getting dressed he hopes he can bring himself to face Stanley without bursting into tears. He knows he'll at least be a little upset depending on what Stanley says to him, but he's accepted that. As long as he doesn't start crying he'd consider it a successful interaction

As he steps out the door of his home, Richie feels an odd sense of positivity. Not hope, per se, but a light feeling, a good feeling. The thought that maybe, he won't end up back on his bedroom floor again.

That feeling is quickly crushed when Henry Bowers drives by in his old, beat-up car and calls Richie an assortment of slurs before speeding off to the school. Why he was driving by Richie's house, Richie doesn't know, but he's sure there were no good intentions. Hell, Richie doesn't even know how Henry knows where he lives, but he just can't bring himself to care.

It's no matter at this point. Richie just knows this isn't a good time. It's letting him know he's going to have a bad day, a sign from the universe not to get excited.

Oh well. He should've expected this.

Richie goes to school with dread pooling in his stomach and a heavy feeling in his limbs. It wasn't a good day.

**Author's Note:**

> i literally pulled this entire thing out of my ass and it is very late so i apologize if this makes no sense. the ending is very open eded because I'm not creative but didn't want to write anymore fojnvojsfnv. i hope this was at least relatively enjoyable.


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